Separated Self
by Kris6
Summary: When does reality become fantasy? Is there a difference? Faith isn't so sure.
1. The Room

Separated Self

Disclaimer: If I owned them I wouldn't have even bothered writing this.

Rating: Who knows? Faith is involved, so it is at least PG.

Pairing: When I know, you'll know.

Summary: When does reality become fantasy? Is there a difference? Faith isn't so sure.

A/N: I got the title from the song 'Separated Self' by Saliva.

A/N 2: Thoughts are in _italics._

"Should've been there B, it was quite a ride," Faith says as she punches Buffy in the face and jumps, landing on the bed of a truck.

Buffy runs to the side of the building and looks down to see Faith being driven away. "You should've been **_here _**Faith," she laments to herself, grief-stricken.

Faith is pacing manically as she bites her fingernails. Suddenly she stops, looks up and looks around the room. She sighs and looks back down to resume her pacing and nail biting.

"How long has she been awake?" A woman asks a man in a lab coat as they watch her though a two-sided mirror.

"Only for about twenty minutes. Her brain waves were erratic and then her vitals stopped and then she was awake. She's been pacing and mumbling to herself since," he tells the woman.

"How long until my Faith is back to normal?" The woman sobs.

"We don't know what kind of progress your daughter will make Mrs. Porter, but we assure you, this is a big step for her," he says in comforting tones.

Faith stops again and looks at the mirror. She stops her nail biting activities and walks over to it suspiciously. Cautiously she peers into the mirror and places her hand on the surface as if she was looking, not at herself but, through the glass.

On the other side, the doctor and Mrs. Porter watch her with interest. "Do you think she knows we're here?" She whispers.

"I don't know," is his honest reply.

Faith cocks her head to the side as if she was listening to them. _I can break through this. _She thinks to herself as she studies the glass. Drawing her arms back, she starts to strike it with both fists. Once. Twice. Three times she does this.

She glances down at her bloodied knuckles and back up to the bloody, but not cracked, mirror with obvious curiosity. "What is she doing?" The woman asks with horror.

"Trying to break through the mirror I think," he replies with shock.

Faith is still studying her hands. She feels the pain, but is confused by it nonetheless. _It didn't break. _She muses. _I haven't hurt like this since Buffy had just st-_ then it hit her.

"This isn't real!" She yells into the mirror. "This I some kind of Slayer dream isn't it?" She asks as if speaking to a higher power. "You can't fool me," she says into the mirror.

"She's delusional," the doctor murmurs.

"We should help her," the mother concludes as she sees the blood trickling down her daughter's knuckles and fingertips.

"We should be careful. I am going to call the nurse to have a tranquilizer brought over…for everyone's protection," he tells the stricken woman, who simply nods.

Getting irritated with the continually flowing blood she starts to wipe it off on her _hospital gown? _She looks up and starts to pace again, just now noticing her surroundings.

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So, yes, this is a cliffhanger. What do you think so far?


	2. Reality Fails

A/N: I had to change and add to some of the dialogue from the scene in _Graduation Day II. _

**__**

"I am just a pilgrim on the edge, on the edge of my perception.

We are travelers at the edge, we are always at the edge of our perception."

- A surrationalist poster 

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__

Faith really begins to panic as she frantically continues to pace and look around at the room. _White padded walls? Pale green hospital gown? I'll take **Twilight Zone **for $500. _She sighs and takes a seat in the corner facing the door and pulls her knees up to her chest, but then immediately stands right back up again.

"What's going on?" She shouts forcefully at the mirror. "Did I die? Is this Hell?" She asks with increasing fear building up.

The door opens and the nurse enters carefully. "Hello Ms. Porter. I'm Nurse Parker," she states sweetly at the young girl.

Seconds later, Faith has her hands wrapped around the nurse's throat up against the wall. "What's going on? How did I get here? Where is 'here'?" She asks slowly in a low growl.

"Ms. Porter, good to see you moving around again," the doctor says. Faith hears the voice and turns to the man, a wary smile on her face, the nurse forgotten.

"Giles?" Faith says questioningly with relief written all over her face. "Thank god. You have to get me out of here by graduation. I need to be there to help Buffy with the Mayor," she says as she approaches the man.

"You know I cannot do that with you in your current condition," he tells her as he takes a step back at her advances. "Why do you need to be at graduation? And what does the mayor have to do with anything?" He asks curiously.

"You know…his Ascension. I know she told you about that, I was there," Faith says as she begins to grow worried again. "What condition are you talking about?" She asks after a second.

"You just woke up Faith, some things have changed. You've been away from us for quite some time," Giles tells her as gently as he can while nodding discreetly at the nurse behind her, who begins to approach.

"What are you talking about G-Man?" Faith asks shakily. "Where…when…what is going on?" She stammers.

"You've been unconscious for two years. It's 1999 now. You're at the Los Angeles Psychiatric Hospital," Giles says slowly and calmly.

"No, no, no. It was '99 when I jumped. This is something else totally," Faith frantically states as she feels the nurse approaching behind her. She punches Giles hard in the face to get past him, but then is restrained by two security guards. She struggles to escape, but stops dead in her tracks when an unexpected figure steps into view. 

"Mommy?" Faith says in a little voice. "I'm sorry- whatever I did, I'm just…sorry. Please, don't let them do this to me," she pleads.

Her mother goes to answer, but before another word is spoken, a needle lodges itself into the back of Faith's arm as Faith cries out in pain. Then, everything seems okay again as Faith relaxes and falls back into the doctor's arms.

"This reminds me of that whole thing with Buffy," he murmurs to the nurses and Mrs. Porter, who nod in agreement.

"What about Buffy? Where is she?" Faith manages to ask…or slur rather, unsure of when the doctor started carrying her.

The doctor exchanges worried glances with Faith's mother. "She's here in the hospital Faith," he says, still unsure.

"Can I see her?" Faith asks weakly, her energy ebbing away.

Faith's mother nods at the doctor, who looks back down at Faith. "Only for a minute," he says as they head down a wing of the hospital. 

They stop at a door and the doctor gently lets Faith back to her feet after the door is opened. Faith is momentarily sobered as she sees Buffy sitting in a corner on the floor hugging her knees and staring vacantly into the air. Taking a few tentative steps towards the other Slayer, Faith sits down on the floor in front of her. 

The empty look on the smaller girl's face disappears as a flash of recognition and life appear when she is forced to stare into the brunette's eyes as Faith takes her hand. However, Faith's body catches up with her at that moment to give out as and she passes out, still holding the hand of the blonde.

**__**

Faith wakes up and finds herself back in the apartment the Mayor got for her. She breathes a sigh of relief as she realizes that it all must have been a dream. She sees all of her stuff boxed up and she goes over and idly looks through the contents. As she opens a box, memories started to flow freely and she finds herself getting caught up in them. Buffy. The Mayor. Her family.

"Are you moving again?" Comes a familiar voice from behind Faith, pulling her out of her reverie. 

She turns around and sees Buffy behind her, looking around. "When did you get here?" Faith asks, wondering why her thoughts are so muddled and desperately wondering if she was supposed to be mad at Buffy.

Buffy tilts her head to the side in confusion. "I'm not sure," she responds. 

Faith sees things in the room flashing around her. A cat on the bed, turning into her in a hospital bed. She blinks hard. _This is just a dream then. _She realizes.

"Who's going to take care of her?" Buffy asks, pointing to the cat on the bed, which flashes to Faith and back again.

"Aren't these things supposed to take care of themselves?" She answers carelessly, still trying to figure out what is going on.

Buffy nods in understanding. "I get it. Like a higher power," she answers knowingly.

Faith turns to look at Buffy again and tilts her head to the side, paying attention to what is being said. "I'm pretty sure that's not what I meant," she replies with a smirk.

Buffy closes her eyes in concentration and Faith watches the flow of emotions over her counterpart's face. "There's something I'm supposed to be doing," she states after a moment.

Nodding, Faith turns to look out the window and is struck by a thought. "Oh yeah. Miles to go," she nods in agreement, knowing the world still needs the blonde. "Little Miss Muffet counting down from seven-three-oh," she states with a sad expression. She knows she told Buffy something she shouldn't have told her yet, but can't put her finger on what she said wrong.

"Great. Riddles," Buffy sighs sardonically.

Faith smiles because Buffy didn't figure out the secret either. "Sorry. It's my head. A lot of new stuff," she sheepishly apologizes. _Probably whatever those doctors pumped into my system. Must've been some powerful shit. _She sighs as she looks out the window, trying to ignore her body laying on the bed. She realizes the window is still broken. "They're never going to fix this are they?" She asks with a frown.

Buffy looks when Faith's attention is, but pays no mind to it. "What about you?" She asks with concern.

Faith looks away from the window and smiles at the cat on the bed. _She stabs me then wonders if it will be all right. Will the world ever cease to amaze? _She smirks slightly. "Scar tissue. It fades. It all fades," she responds instead, staring distractedly at the fading knife in Buffy's hand. She flinches at the…_What? At the memory? Is it even a memory? _She briefly wonders, but then shakes it off. "Human weakness. It never goes away. Even his," she states, drifting off into a faraway memory, that might not even be real.

She nods in response. "I wasn't talking about your stomach," she replies absently.

Faith knows this and she looks down. "Like I said, these things are supposed to take care of themselves," she shrugs and Buffy follows her gaze to see the cat rubbing against Faith's leg.

Buffy looks strangely at her and Faith wonders, absurdly, if Buffy is reading her mind. "Is this your mind or mine?" Buffy asks with a smile.

Faith pauses, not knowing herself before breaking out into laughter. "Beats me," she responds with a shrug. She feels a strange tug and looks at the clock, the little hand moving forward, then backwards rapidly. Her laughter fades as she realizes that time is short. "Getting towards that time," she sighs.

Buffy takes another look around. "How are you going to fit all of this stuff?" She asks, looking at all the boxes.

Faith thinks for a moment. _None of this will be real when I wake up. These memories are all fake anyways. When I wake up, the last few years will have just been a lie. _"Not gonna. It's yours," she says noncommittally.

Buffy looks at all of the boxes in amazement. "I can't use all of this," she states while shaking her head.

Faith smiles and shrugs slowly. "Just take what you need. I won't exactly need it where I'm going," she points out. Buffy goes to say something, but Faith touches her face lightly to silence her. "You ready?" She asks in a low voice and Buffy closes her eyes, nods and then…disappears.

After a sleeping Faith is put back into her room, her mother turns to the doctor. "When will my baby be able to come home?" She asks in whispered tones.

"Hopefully in a few days. We will all have to try our best to help her forget about her fantasy world where she is some 'Vampire Slayer' and reacquaint her with reality," he responds. "Your husband may be able to help with that. When will he be back?" He asks.

She sighs and hangs her head. "I gave him a brief call a moment ago. Richard said he'd be back tomorrow, tomorrow night at the very latest," she replies and the doctor nods.

**__**

Meanwhile, in Sunnydale

Buffy suddenly wakes, knowing how to destroy the Mayor and thanking whoever is listening, that Faith was willing to help…in her own way. She lets a sad smile take over as she realizes that her one time friend is in the hospital as well. She stands up and looks into a nearby room and sees the dark-haired girl resting in a bed. _At least she's peaceful. _Buffy thinks as she pecks Faith on the forehead and gently brushes a stray hair off of the brunette's face.

Faith groans and begins to stir and she stretches…at least tries to. _Why can't I move? _She thinks groggily as she tries to recall what is happening. After tugging with her arms and legs she finds she is worn out and looks and sees that she is restrained to a bed. _Kinky. _She thinks idly as the door opens and Dr. Giles steps through.

"Did Buffy put you up to this because it isn't funny?" Faith asks as he takes a seat in the swivel chair next to his bed. She briefly notices the bandage on his, now bruised, nose. He looks down at his clipboard briefly. "Okay! It worked. I'm not all psychotic and crazy anymore, please, just let me go," she pleads.

Finally, Giles looks up at her. "Do you know who I am?" He asks.

"Giles, you're Buffy's watcher. Why are we even talking about this? You're the librarian at Sunnydale High," she adds as she wonders why she can't break her bindings.

"No. I am both yours and Buffy's doctor," Giles responds as he subtly moves to the edge of his seat. "What is the very last thing you remember?" He asks, pen poised to take notes.

Faith sighs. "Buffy and I were fighting. She stabbed me, I punched her, I jumped off of a building. G, come on, what's happening here? What is B trying to accomplish with all of this?" She questions, growing increasingly afraid.

He removes his glasses and begins to clean them. "Faith, you and Buffy never fought or stabbed each other. None of that. You were the healthiest couple I'd ever seen," he says with a light smile, which almost immediately fades. "However, when Buffy got into her…current state, you tried to kill yourself," he informs her gravely. Faith stares at him, dumbstruck.

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So, what do you think? Does it totally suck ass? Should I continue?

Again, apologies on 'Chasing Shadows' chapter 8.


	3. Looking for Answers

To say that Faith was confused would be an understatement. Questions began to flow into her mind. _Healthy couple? Buffy's in a condition? I tried to kill myself? _Faith shakes her head and looks at Giles.

"What do you mean 'her current state'? What is that?" Faith begins questioning. "And kill myself? I have no idea what any of this is," she admits, racking her brain for any sign of recognition.

Giles flips through the papers o his clipboard before settling on a crumpled sheet of notebook paper. "I am going to untie you now. Don't try anything," he warns as he goes for her bindings.

"Don't worry," Faith scoffs as he unties her and she sits up, rubbing her sore wrists. She looks at the paper in his hand with mild curiosity.

"This is the note that you had written prior to your suicide attempt," Giles states, answering her unasked question. She snatches the rumpled sheet of paper and reads:

__

To Whom It May Concern

I can't take it anymore. It hurts so much seeing her this way. I can't stand that vacant, far away expression in her eyes knowing that this is all my fault. I can't stand Mrs. Summers' sympathetic gaze because I know that deep down she hates me and knows that this is all my doing. I am sorry for all of the pain I caused and I suffer every day knowing that Buffy is always so close and so far away all in one. I just want all the pain to stop.

-Faith

She puts down the paper, in her own handwriting, and sighs. "I don't remember any of this. When did it all happen?" She asks softly.

"Back in '97, two years ago," Giles tells her.

_About when I was called. _Faith sighs. "What happened? What did I do to her?" She asks, rubbing her eyes.

Giles sets his clipboard down on his lap and studies Faith for a moment. "You were 15 and she was 16. The two of you were driving home from Lake Tahoe and it was snowing outside and you swerved to miss a tree and went flying into the lake. You swam back up, but Buffy didn't," he sighs.

"So she drowned?" Faith asks in a panic as she stands back up and begins to pace.

Giles tilts his head to the side. "No. You dove back in and saved her. You got pneumonia, but she has been catatonic ever since," he tells her.

"So, none of the past two years was real," she mumbles to herself. "But, I don't remember any of that. I don't remember Mom or Buffy or you being a doctor…none of this. I thought she and I had just met 8 months ago," she says with a desperate tone in her voice.

"This is very peculiar," Giles states as he cleans his glasses. "It seems to be some sort of selective amnesia," he observes. "Perhaps seeing familiar faces will help bring back some of your memories," he says with a slight smile.

"Maybe," she acquiesces. "Like what people?" She asks in a neutral tone as she sits back down.

"Your mother of course. Your father is flying in tomorrow morning and your sister is coming home tomorrow as well," he informs her with a warm smile.

"No, I don't have a sister and my parents are dead," Faith responds as she shakes her head.

Giles looks down at the clipboard. "It's all here in your file," he informs her, glancing down again.

"Well, maybe you grabbed the wrong one! Check again," she orders and Giles prepares himself to restrain her.

"Ms. Porter, please. You can check for yourself," he says diplomatically as he hands over the clipboard.

Faith takes it and begins to read. _Faith Adrienne Porter. Born April 10, 1985. Father: Richard William Porter. Mother: Julianne Marie Porter. Siblings: Katrina Lynn Porter. _She looks up at the doctor in confusion. However, before she can see the pictures of her family, the door opens.

"Baby?" Mrs. Porter asks tentatively with an expectant hopefulness as she enters the room. Faith looks up to see the dark features of her mother's face, so very much like her own. "I can't believe you're really back," she says teary eyed and suppressing a sob.

"I thought you were dead," Faith finds herself saying, against the better judgment of her brain.

"No Sweetie. Why would I be dead?" She asks with slight confusion.

Faith moves her mouth up and down for a few moments. "Kakistos and the…blood…and all the fire," she stammers before shaking her head. "It doesn't matter," she finally says, shaking away all of her false memories.

"We have our whole lives to talk about these things baby," Julianne tells her daughter, smiling kindly. "Your father and sister will be here shortly," she offers as well.

"I don't remember them. I don't remember a sister," Faith reluctantly admits.

Julianne's smile falters a bit as she looks to the doctor. Giles clears his throat. "It seems that your daughter has some sort of selective amnesia," he informs her. "I feel that familiar things will help her to remember though," he says to help ease her mind some.

"Don't worry sweetie, we'll help you get back to the way things used to be," Julianne states as she continues to stare at her daughter as if she was afraid that Faith wasn't real.

"I hope so," Faith nods with a weak smile of her own.

Back in Giles' office, he closes the door as Julianne enters right behind him.

"Tell me what is going on," she orders without any preamble whatsoever. Giles blinks hard for a couple of seconds. "I just want to understand," she says more gently.

Giles wipes off his glasses on his jacket as he prepares to answer. "She seems to have only false memories of some other life," he says after a moment.

"But why? What kind of memories would include Richard and I being dead and Katie never having existed?" Julianne asks desperately.

Giles sighs. "Perhaps to help her mind cope with being in a coma. It must've been hard for her to tear herself away from her family so, while she was nearly dead to you, you were dead to her," he explains to the woman before him.

"Okay," Julianne slowly replies, letting it sink in for a moment. "But what about Katie and Buffy? You told me that she and Buffy had gotten into some sort of brawl which nearly got them both killed," she points out.

"I feel that with Buffy it was more over the guilt of not having been able to keep her in a conscious state. I don't know what would be the cause of her pushing Katrina away completely though," he admits.

"This is all so complicated," Julianne sighs.

Before Giles can get another word in however, the phone rings. "Hello…I see…Of course…Send them up…Yes, goodbye," he says to the other person on the line. "The secretary at the front desk has just informed me that Katrina and Richard have just arrived," he tells the woman with a smile.

"Oh, thank god," she sates with a sigh of relief.

Faith is just sitting in an empty room with padded walls waiting for something to happen, anything. She sighs and leans her head against the wall and closes her eyes. Just as she begins to get comfortable, the door opens and she jumps up to her feet at the sudden intrusion.

"Faith, baby?" Comes an all to familiar voice as her father enters the room with a big grin on his face.

"Hey there," the young woman behind him says with a soft smile of her own as she steps up from behind the man.

Faith looks between the two of them rapidly several times, blinking her eyes rapidly to make sure that they were real. They are. She stands there gaping as she can't wrap her mind around the sight of Richard Wilkins, the mayor of Sunnydale, and Kate, her dead ex-Watcher,

standing before her.

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What do you think? Was it worth the wait? ;)


	4. The Tie that Binds

"What's wrong Fathie, not happy to see your big sister?" Kate asks trying not to frown.

Faith continues to stare at the two in front of her and her brow furrows in consternation at her ex- watcher's nickname for her. "I-uh-I," she stammers as her eyes dart between them.

"We missed you," Richard says to his daughter, taking a tentative step towards the young brunette. 

Faith looks at them both and wonders how two of the people she had loved so much can inspire so much fear in her now. "I don't understand what's going on here," Faith thinks to herself out loud.

Kate looks at her father, who nods before walking up to her sister, who barely notices because she is lost in her thoughts. "Fathie?" She says quietly, touching the younger girl's shoulder. 

Faith looks up and into the other woman's eyes. "Yeah?" She asks with utter desperation, even evident in her whispered tone.

"Whatever happened in here," Kate begins, tapping the side of Faith's head lightly, "is over now. None of that was real," she tells her sister slowly. "Mom, Dad and I, we're real and we're here for you. Just please, please, talk to us sweetie," she says lovingly.

Faith takes a deep breath and looks at the other woman, sizing her up for a moment. "You're my sister?" She asks, trying not to sound impolite.

Kate gives Richard a pleading expression and he approaches them and sits on the bed in front of his youngest daughter. "The Dr. Giles explained to us that you had replaced all of your real memories with false ones while you were catatonic," he says to her.

Faith looks down at her hands. "How can I make up all of that though? How can I imagine a whole other life and just erase this one?" She asks, trying not to accept that the last few years have been a figment.

"To ease your guilt over Buffy perhaps," Richard shrugs. 

"This sucks," Faith sighs as this all begins to seep in. 

"Yeah," Kate agrees as she nods her head and Faith smirks in response. "The doctor said that your memories will start coming back as you get readjusted to reality," she tells Faith.

"I have to learn to live again I guess," Faith says to her father and sister.

"That's it baby, just give it time and things will get back to normal again," Richard says, hoping to ease his daughter's wary mind.

"Yeah, normal," she mumbles to herself.

Later that night, Faith is lying in her hospital bed and staring at the ceiling. Her 'family' has gone home for the night to prepare for her return home. 

Her mind is reeling from the events in the past few hours. There can be no clear cut answers for her. _Maybe they're right. Maybe Sunnydale was a fabrication and maybe I did block out reality. _Faith sighs and decides to give these people a shot. _What's the worst that can happen? _

Faith wakes up the next morning feeling determined to find out the truth about her life. She stretches and yawns before getting up out of bed and pacing. Everything from the previous day begins to flow through her mind as she searches out any kind of a flaw in this reality. She comes up empty.

The door opens and Faith turns to see who it is. "Good morning Ms. Porter," Dr. Giles greets the wary brunette. 

"Morning G," she replies, watching him carefully.

"I spoke with your family yesterday before they went home for the evening," he informs the young woman.

"I see. What did they say?" She inquires, genuinely curious.

"They told me that you wanted to try and get readjusted to everything," he explains to her and she nods in reply. "I am going to ask you something and I want you to think it over and give me an honest response," he says.

"Okay, what is it?" She asks after a moment of silence.

"Are you willing to put forth the effort to remember and begin your life here again?" He asks seriously.

Faith lets the question sink in. She thinks back to, what she knows, as the last two years and she thinks about what she has learned about herself in the last day. With a sigh, she begrudgingly acknowledges to herself that this life seems to be nearly perfect. "Yes, I want to be a part of this life?" She responds after a moment of deliberation.

Dr. Giles smiles and nods his head. "I'm glad to hear that and I am willing to release you into your parents custody today," he informs her.

Faith quirks a smile of her own before narrowing her eyes. "What's the catch?" She asks suspiciously.

The doctor's smile wavers slightly, but he plays it off. "There are a couple of conditions," he admits and Faith crosses her arms and sits back in her seat. "First of all, I need you to stop this thing with vampires, demons and slayers. If you continue to believe this, then you will retard your progress and may put yourself and your family at risk," he says to her.

Faith's arms drop to her lap and she sighs. "Okay, no vampires or anything," she replies reluctantly.

Giles nods. "I also have a number of prescriptions that I need you to take according to their labels," he informs her.

"Wait. If I get out of her today, I'm going to be forced to readjust to life as a doped up mental case," Faith argues as she gives him an intimidating stare an he gives her a blank 'are you finished?' expression. "What will you be dealing me?" She sighs.

After giving her the requisite glare, he answers her. "I will be giving you something to counteract your aggressive behavior, one for your mood swings, one to combat depression and a drug to block out your delusions," he lists for her.

Faith sighs again and slumps in her chair. "So, are there any other conditions before I can go?" She asks shortly.

"I will need to see you once a week to check on your progress to see if you are adjusting well and if releasing you was a good idea," Giles adds. "If we are clear on this all, then I will begin processing your release forms. Are we clear?" He asks.

Faith looks up at him. "Crystal," she says unenthusiastically.

"Brilliant," he smiles as he stands and exit's the room.

Faith is sitting in a car with Kate and the two of them are driving home. "Are you excited to finally be going back?" Kate asks her with a broad grin.

Faith smiles at the other woman's enthusiasm. "Yeah. I guess I'm a little anxious to get back to reality," she finds herself saying.

"Good," Kate nods with a small smile. "Mom and Dad are already getting you reregistered into school for next year and they've already called all of yours and Buffy's friends," she says before she could sensor what was coming out of her mouth.

Faith looks at her sister and notices the blush on the woman's face. "They've all congregated at the house haven't they?" She asks, though she already knows the answer.

"That would be a 'yes'," Kate replies, trying to hide her blush.

"Fabulous," Faith responds, rolling her eyes.

Kate smirks. "Well, here we are. Home sweet home," she says as they pull up in front of the house.

Faith apprehensively gets out of the vehicle and looks over at Kate. "I don't think I can do this. I don't remember anybody from here," she says quietly as she looks at the house.

"Don't worry. You'll be fine. They all know about the amnesia thing," Kate waves off. "Besides, I've never known you to be afraid of anything before ever," she adds.

Faith grins over at her as they reach the door. "Okay then," she says as she twists the knob and opens the door.


	5. Welcome Home

Kate and Faith enter the house and a resounding, "Welcome home!" Is shouted from a dozen or so people in the living room of Faith's home.

Faith's jaw drops as she looks from person to person. "Hey," she quietly replies after a brief moment of mental lapse. Before they can help themselves, four people in particular rush over and envelop Faith in a bear hug. "Breathing becoming an issue," she gasps after a moment.

"Yeah, sorry about that," a brunette woman apologizes as she blushes and tries to regain her composure.

"Speak for yourself," a dark haired male smirks.

"Alex," the redhead next to him admonishes as she gives Faith a shy smile. Faith smiles back softly as she watches Cordelia, Xander-Alex-and Willow interact while Oz steps back and watches them as well.

Faith sits back, amazed at how everything meshed itself into this existence. She smiles at some of her friends from Boston and the Sunnydale crew talk and joke like old friends, which they actually are.

"How are you holding up?" An unexpected voice asks the thoughtful brunette.

Faith is startled at the intrusion and further startled by the person it is coming from. "I'm doing okay I guess Cordy," she shrugs in response.

"I was just curious because I know how you were always one to try and be up in the middle of everything," she smiles fondly at Faith. "But then again, I suppose two years of being in some bizarro comaland can make a girl feel a little less social," she shrugs.

Faith smirks. "You must be some kind of expert," she replies in her 'smart ass' voice.

"Yeah, well…" Cordy trails off with a modest shrug and a grin. "But really, how are you?" She asks more seriously.

"I'm just trying to adapt. This is all so new to me and I don't really know how to cope with all of theses changes," Faith explains with a sigh.

"Was it better?" Cordy asks and Faith gives her a blank expression. "Your life in Sunnydale, was it better than this one seems to be? I heard you were some kind of superhero or something," she elaborates.

Faith releases a small chuckle and shakes her head. "Not at all. Sunnydale wasn't all that great. I think that's why it's hard to believe it wasn't real because I don't understand why I would create some shitty existence for myself," she explains.

"Maybe that doctor was right, maybe you created it over guilt," Cordelia shrugs. "All I know is that it's good to have you back," she smiles warmly.

"Thanks," Faith replies sincerely.

"What are you two doing? Come on, get up and stop being so antisocial," Alex grins as he approaches the two brunettes. Cordy stands up and offers her hand to help Faith up, who accepts the invitation.

"Hey Faith," JT, one of her friends from Boston, greets the brunette. "It's great to have ya back kid," he grins at the girl.

"Yeah, how goes it? You feelin' better?" Kyle asks casually.

"You know me, five-by-five," Faith shrugs, trying, and failing, to suppress a grin and everyone can't help but laugh.

"See guys, that's what I missed," Kyle announces. "That right there, that is pure Faith man. Don't nobody can pull off obscure slang like Shorty here," he informs the whole room, pointing at a smirking Faith.

"So Porter, you up for parting yet or are you supposed to be keeping straight or what?" Jessie asks with exaggerated innocence.

"I dunno," Faith shrugs mischievously. "Doc says that I should keep myself rested after having just woken up a couple days ago," she sighs dramatically.

"Well, if it's doctor's orders, we would be doing you a great disservice by taking you out to celebrate," JT states with a shrug and mock concern.

"But since when have I ever let anyone, let alone a doctor, give me orders?" Faith smirks, easily falling back into old habits from before she was 'called'. _No, never a Slayer, never called. Current habits, not old. _She tells herself.

"Faith, are you sure that that would be a good idea?" Willow asks timidly, speaking for the first time since Faith joined the conversation.

Faith turns and looks at the redhead. "Not at all, but I won't know until I try," she replies and Willow just nods, her concern not at all alleviated. Suddenly Faith finds herself in a flashback.

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_Faith is walking with Willow and Buffy down a hall at Hemory High School. Buffy and Willow are talking about the lab assignment from their last class. Faith just walks along with her arm over her girlfriend's shoulder and Buffy's arm around Faith's waist._

Suddenly, JT and Kyle fling themselves at Faith, catching the brunette off guard and almost toppling her and Buffy over. "What up kid?" JT asks as he puts his arm over his friend's shoulder as Buffy just looks at them and rolls her eyes.

"Nothin' much, just trying to walk down the hall without some slob tacklin' me," Faith states nonchalantly as she nudges the taller boy in the side.

"What he meant to say was, are you coming to the party tonight at Jessie's place?" Kyle asks to make up for JT's tactlessness.

"I 'spose," Faith shrugs. "How about you B, care to join in some adolescent shenanigans?" She asks the blonde.

"I can't and neither can you because tomorrow is Wednesday, not Saturday," Buffy says in a mild warning tone.

"We have school five days a week. Jess only has a party, like, once a month and it's always totally kick ass. I'm sure the world of academia could survive without you for just one day," Faith reasons.

Buffy rolls her eyes again. "I just worry about your C- average…and your liver," she replies while shaking her head.

"Grades are overrated…especially for me as I yearn to be a professional burger flipper. Besides, if you're worried about my liver, I can always get a transplant when it's about to fail," she shrugs with a smirk.

Buffy shakes her head. "Count me out, we have a chemistry test tomorrow anyways and Will and I are actually going to study for. Besides, I have cheerleading practice after class tomorrow too," she finishes.

"Chemistry test? Red, do we really have a chemistry test or is she shirking her duties as a high school student?" Faith asks Willow.

Willow quirks a smile at the brunette. "Sorry Faith, but she shirks you not," she replies with amusement.

Faith chuckles at the redhead's reply. "Ah well, I'll just have to tell you all about it tomorrow night. Maybe I'll take pictures too, that way it'll be like you're really there," she smirks at Buffy.

"No thanks baby, I really don't want to see another picture of Mark's hairy ass mooning the camera, but it was a nice gesture," Buffy replies good-naturedly.

"They say it's the thought that counts," Faith shrugs modestly and Buffy smiles before glancing at a clock on the wall and sighing.

"I have to get to my next class to ask Mr. Peterson about our project. See you later sweetie," Buffy smiles as she gives her girlfriend a quick kiss on the lips.

"Are you sure that was a good idea?" Willow asks Faith.

"What deciding not to take pictures?" Faith asks in confusion.

"No, blowing off your girlfriend, studying **and** a big chemistry test for some party?" She asks more clearly.

"It's not just 'some party'," JT cuts in. "Jessie only has a party whenever her parents are out of the country," he adds.

"Which is every three weeks," Willow rolls her eyes.

"I won't know if it was a good idea until tonight now will I?" Faith smiles and winks at her redheaded friend before deciding to skip out on the rest of the day with her friends.

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"Hey, you alright kid?" JT asks his friend with concern.

"Yeah, great. Guess I just zoned out there for a second," Faith replies with a grin, happy that she's at least remembering things, so she knows this must be real.

"We thought we were losing you again there for a second Shorty," Kyle smiles softly.

"No, I'm just excited to be back," Faith tells everyone with a smile.

"Cool," Jessie smiles. "Hey, I gotta get goin', but you'll be there tonight right Porter?" She asks with a broad grin.

"I wouldn't miss it," Faith responds as Jessie leaves. "What about you Red, are you willing to join in the festivities tonight?" She asks the other girl.

"Uh, no. Alex and I have finals to study for," Willow replies, trying not to show her discomfort.

Faith quirks her brow. "What about you Cordy?" She asks the brunette beside Willow.

After a moment of deliberation, Cordelia comes to a verdict. "Sure," she replies simply.

"Sweet. So I'll see you tonight then," Faith says with a smile which Cordy returns.

"We do have to go now though. Especially if I have a party to get ready for," Cordelia states dramatically, referring to her, Willow and Alex.

"See you tonight C and I'll see you guys later," she waves the others. Soon after, everyone else filters themselves out of the house, waving their 'goodbyes' and 'see you laters' to Faith.

"See," Kate says as she reenters the living room.

"See what?" Faith asks in confusion as to what her sister-_Watcher?_-was talking about.

"I told you it wouldn't take long to get reacquainted with everyone," Kate smiles as she leans over and gives her little sister a hug.

"Okay, I guess you were right," the younger girl acquiesces with a smirk.

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Okay, this was not a very long chapter and it did take me a while to get it out. I had trouble with how I wanted to structure this chapter. Also I had to deal with the stresses of the end of my school year (which is over now--YAY) and procrastination in general.

If you like this chapter let me know, if you don't, let me know anyways.


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